


Adored

by literati42



Category: Prodigal Son (TV 2019)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Things Happen Bingo, Edrisa needs a hug too, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Gen, Heartbreak, Hurt/Comfort, Malcolm Bright Needs a Hug, Malcolm Bright Whump, Potential lovers to friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:35:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24332164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/literati42/pseuds/literati42
Summary: Edrisa adores Malcolm. Malcolm has realized it. An explosion at a crime scene leads to a necessary conversation.Bad Things Happen Bingo: Broken Limb
Comments: 8
Kudos: 53





	Adored

**Author's Note:**

> For the Bad Things Happen Bingo (on tumblr) prompt Broken Limb
> 
> Here there be angst but also friendship!   
> Also, I blame the Prodigal Son trash discord for encouraging this. You all know what you did. <3
> 
> Finally, this is not an anti-Malcolm/Edrisa fic. It's more an exploration of their friendship.
> 
> I hope you all join me on twitter @themythofpsyche, on tumblr @literati42 and on tiktok @profchrisagent

Bright’s entire world was pain. Then slowly, the agony started to focus into his leg.

“Bright!” Edrisa’s voice called out to him. She sounded scared. She also sounded far away, but that did not make sense because when he turned his head to the side, she was right there. The ME laid her hand on his shoulder. “Hey…are you okay?”

He wanted to answer her, but all the pain in the world was screaming at him from his right leg, and his foggy brain calculated he could get out one sentence, so he forced out, “What happened?” instead.

“It was some kind of explosion!” Edrisa said, glancing around them as if she could find some answer written on the wall. He frowned, trying to put together what he remembered.

The day started with a headache that would not quit. It was bad enough that Bright found himself stuttering through the profile and squinting at the florescent lights like they personally offended him. Then they went to the crime scene, down in the metro tunnels. After descending the stairs, a wave of dizziness hit him so hard he nearly collapsed on the body. Gil pulled him aside to try and send him home, and Bright knew he was harsher to his father figure than he meant to be. Either way, Gil was patient as always. The lieutenant allowed him to stay, but he could not chase down a suspect in his state.

“Stay with Edrisa and see what you can learn,” Gil had said to him. It must have been just a moment before, but it seemed distant.

“He made me stay with you to keep me safe,” Bright said. Edrisa nodded, sitting on her heels. Her lab coat and dark hair were covered with dust from the explosion. Dirt smudged her face, giving it a gray tinge in the low light of the tunnel.

“I know,” she said, “Ironic. Like, actually ironic, not ironic in the Morissette way.” She focused her eyes back on him. Bright did not like the pinched expression of her face. “Can you move your leg?” Moving his leg was the last thing he wanted to attempt. Bright tried to shift enough to look at it, and a groan escaped his lips. Edrisa’s hand on his chest stilled him. “There’s rubble on it.” She moved, putting her shoulder against the piece of the tunnel currently pressed into his leg. She pushed, and everything went white.

“Bright! Bright!” Edrisa’s panicked shouting brought him back from the edge the pain pushed him to.

“Don’t…don’t try to move it again.”

“I won’t,” she said. She dropped her head to his chest as a sob escaped her throat.

“Edrisa…” he said, “Go get help.”  
“I can’t,” she said through her tears. “We’re trapped.”

Even with the fog of pain clouding his thoughts, Bright realized that she was on the verge of panic, and he was on the verge of unconsciousness. “They know we’re here,” he said, moving his hand to her shoulder. It took him three attempts to connect, his hand flailing in the air. When Edrisa looked at him, he tried to smile. Bright was not at all sure if he succeeded. “They’ll get us out…” The words felt thick and unwieldy.

“Bright,” her voice was sharp. He blinked at her. “You were falling asleep.”

“Oh.”

“You can’t fall asleep, okay?” Edrisa cupped his face. “You need to stay awake until they get us out.”

He furrowed his brow, “I didn’t even notice I was slipping…”

“Then you need to keep talking,” she replied, “Just keep talking to me.” Edrisa studied him. “How’s your head?”

“It’s funny. My leg hurts so much I can’t tell if I have a headache anymore.”

“I don’t think that’s funny,” she replied. The ME frowned, and as he watched, she laid down on the floor beside him.

“What are you doing?” he asked. Edrisa turned her head to stare into his eyes.

“It feels weird talking to you when we’re not on the same level. I mean eye level. Obviously, you are always on another level intellectually.”

Bright frowned at her. “You shouldn’t sell yourself short like that.”

“I’m not,” she said, “I’m a catch, and I am smart, but my brain doesn’t work like yours does.”

“I don’t know about that,” he said, “And even if it is true, you have a billion skills I don’t have.”

“I do?” she replied.

“The way you are with people…you slide into social situations like you’re putting on a second skin.”

She laughed and gently touched his arm, “Bright, you’re so sweet.” She left her hand there, and his eyes went to it. The ME noticed his look a second later and pulled her hand back.

“Sorry.”

Bright looked back up at fault lines in the ceiling of the tunnel because looking at her was harder. “Edrisa…”

“We need to keep talking,” she said like she had not just interrupted him doing exactly that. “Maybe when we get out of here, we can do something fun?”

“Maybe,” he answered.

“Do you like movies? Because there’s a film series starting at the little indy theater down the way. They are going to show all the Hannibal movies.”

“Edrisa…”

“If you’re not interested in that, we could do something quieter. There’s a coffee shop I really like that puts out all these board games, and you can go there and just play. Sometimes on Friday nights, they have live local music and…”

“Edrisa.” It was hard to focus on her words, but it was not hard to understand what they all meant. Usually when she talked like this, Bright would smile slightly and walk away, letting Gil handle things with her. He did not know what Gil said to her about him, but he saw the look on Gil’s face when she left her hand on Bright’s chest at the Mommy blogger crime scene. Something unspoken passed between Edrisa and Gil, and Bright knew an actual conversation must have come before. “Edrisa…”

“Or we can do whatever you want to do.”

“Edrisa,” he said again, to push passed his muddled thoughts to give a commanding tone. It came out harsh enough to snap in the air between them. Edrisa went silent, looking at him. “Do you know why I act like I don’t notice what you’re asking?” He finally looked back at her.

Her eyes were wide and sad. “I didn’t know you were acting.”

“I wasn’t at first,” he admitted, “But, you had to know even I would pick up on it eventually.” Bright saw his words compounding the stress already in her eyes until tears sprung up. He looked away, unable to meet her gaze any longer.

“Is it because of Eve?” Edrisa asked, “Because I get if you’re not ready. Or…is it because of Dani? Or…JT?”

“Dani or JT?” Bright asked. Maybe his head was still hurting, at least it definitely was foggy because her words made no sense.

“That you like? Is it one of them?”

Bright blinked, finally catching her meaning. “That’s not what this is about, Edrisa,” he said.

“So, you just can’t picture yourself with me.” Her tone was not angry like he expected. She sounded defeated.

“I could picture it too easily,” Bright said. She blinked at him, surprised. Trying to understand. “Edrisa, I may not be good at understanding how people feel about me, but even I can tell that you…” the word made him tense up, “ _adore_ me.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

“I don’t know if it’s a bad thing generally, but it’s a bad thing for me.” Bright shook his head. “I’m not making sense.”

“It’s okay,” she said quietly, “Take your time.” With a stab of pain, he realized that even right now when he was breaking her heart, she was doing everything she could to understand him.

“My father wants to be adored.”

That sent a shock through her. Her eyes widened as she stared at him.

Bright let out a breath, “Dr. Whitly wants people to worship him. The kind of adoration where you don’t see flaws. The kind that consumes you. That’s what he wants.” Bright felt emotions welling up, getting stuck like a physical force in his throat. “And I…I can imagine that. What it would be like to be adored to the point where the other person is consumed with you?” He shook his head, ignoring how it hurt. “I think of all the broken spaces. All the hurt. All the loneliness in me that being adored like that could fill. Shit, Edrisa. It’s so tempting.” He closed his eyes then. “And that scares me. I don’t want to get lost in another person. I don’t want anyone to get lost in me. I don’t want to be someone’s whole world. Except sometimes I do want that, and it scares me.”

“Bright…” Edrisa said, her voice thick with tears. “Wanting to be loved doesn’t make you a narcissist like your father.” She reached out hesitantly to touch his wrist, but he pulled away.

“Wanting to be adored like that would,” he said. Bright forced his eyes to open, forced himself to look at Edrisa so she could read the truth in his eyes. “That’s…that’s not what I really want. I don’t want someone who adores me. I want someone who loves me. You know, who actually sees all the brokenness in me and loves me. Who challenges me to be better, not just believe I am already the best. Edrisa…my mother adored Dr. Whitly, and when he fell off his white horse and revealed who he really was, it destroyed her.”

“But Dr. Whitly didn’t just have tiny flaws…Bright…”

“I know, I know. I’m not him,” Bright said, “But I am _flawed_. Edrisa…I love the way you look at me.” He could hear the plea in his voice, knew his desperation leaked out in every word. “I love the way you see me as a hero…but I can’t be that person. And I don’t want to hurt you when you realize that.”

Edrisa was not meeting his eyes anymore. Slowly she sat up, hugging herself. “Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“Gil said I should,” Bright said quietly, “But I…I was selfish.” Before he could say any more the world around them shook again. The pain in his leg intensified, ran everything from his mind.

When he came back to, he forced his eyes open. Edrisa was over him, a hand on either side of his arms, shielding him. She cupped his face, turning it toward her. “Are you okay?” Here she was, protecting him like nothing had happened between them. “Bright, are you with me?” He nodded, and she hugged him tight with surprise and relief. “I thought you weren’t going to wake up.” She released him and sat back quickly. “Sorry.”

“No…it’s okay.”

They fell into silence. Bright focused on her, forcing himself to stay awake for her. He could not dump all of this on her and then pass out.

“Bright, before the shake…you said you were selfish,” Edrisa said. 

He closed his eyes again, “Yeah. I am, and I’m sorry. I didn’t talk to you about this because I didn’t want you to stop. You are brilliant, funny, caring. You are so confident. I…didn’t want you to stop talking to me.”

“Bright,” she said again, and he turned to look at her. “I’m not going to stop talking to you because you turned me down. You didn’t owe me anything. You didn’t lead me on. I was the one that kept pushing things. You never returned it. I thought eventually you would but…Bright I like you. Genuinely. It wasn’t an ultimatum. It was never, date me or else. I want to be in your life…whatever that means.” She reached out her hand but went no further, offering it, but not forcing it. He took her hand.

“You’re okay?”

“Honestly? I’m going to go home and sob into my pillow, but yeah…I’m okay. I’m a damn catch, right?”

“You are.”

She laid back down on the floor of the tunnel beside him. “I don’t want a guy who doesn’t love me back just as much.” Bright squeezed her hand. “Bright…I’m sorry if I ever made you feel…” She let the words hang for a moment. “Gil talked to me.” She sighed, “Maybe I haven’t been the best version of myself with you.”

“Maybe you’ve gone a bit far,” he said, “But you’ve always been in my corner. You believed me when the team suspected me of murder. You’ve been a good friend to me, Edrisa.”

“And I still will be, Bright.” She squeezed his hand back. A loud sound came from the other side of the rubble.

“Aftershake?”

“No. This I think is help. We’re here!” Edrisa called. She sat up but did not release his hand. “They’re here for us, Bright. We’re getting out.”

_-_-_

After they were separated into two different ambulances, he did not hear a word from her. Bright thought maybe words exchanged in life-threatening circumstances could not be trusted. Maybe when she was safe again, she rethought her promise to stay friends.

So, on his first day back on at the precinct, Bright was not expecting to see her. He hobbled in on crutches, his leg—broken in three places—still impossible to put any weight on. Gil allowed him to come and consult so long as he stayed in the precinct. His profile would have to come from their notes. “You’ll have to go back to getting your information secondhand like every other consultant,” Gil teased him when he tried to protest.

Gil left him, leg propped up in a chair, to await the team’s return.

“Knock, knock.”

Bright turned in his chair, surprised to hear her voice. “Edrisa.”

“Hi,” she gave him a nervous wave.

“Did you need to talk about the case?”

“No,” she replied. “I needed to see you. Can I…” she motioned for the table. Bright gave a nod, trying to read anything in her face as she came over and took a seat across from him. She did not seem angry, but her face was giving him a lot less than usual. The ME laid a blank notepad and a satchel on the table between them. “Bright, I’m sorry I didn’t come see you in the hospital. I had Dani keep me updated, so I knew you were okay, but I needed some…time.”

“I understand.”

“I don’t think you do. I have a confession.”

Bright sat up straighter, “A confession?

“That’s a bad choice of words considering we are in a room where you interrogate actual criminals.” She shook her head, “I’m doing this all wrong.” She took a breath. “Bright…after we talked, I did a lot of thinking. Well, first, I did a lot of crying and eating ice cream and more than a little drinking.” She raised her finger, “I also did a cuddle party, but after all that, I did a lot of thinking. And there is a chance…no, a definite likelihood.” She let out a frustrated breath, “Okay, get it out Edrisa. In the tunnel, I said that I might have gone too far. After thinking about it, I know that I did. I listen to these true crime podcasts, and you became a bit of a favorite when you were a Fed. You know, a young, handsome, brilliant profiler on all the biggest cases? You were podcast gold. And then you came to my precinct. You started working here, and you were nice too. You brought me a lollipop.” Edrisa grabbed the satchel and opened it like she was presenting him evidence. From it, she pulled a perfectly folded lollipop wrapper. “And I just I got so invested in the idea of us, it didn’t matter that you never returned my attention. I was just so certain one day you would.” Tears filled up her eyes. “I thought maybe if I just got to know you better, I could get you to fall for me. But you never came to anything I invited you to. So, I read everything I could find about you, including some files I got ahold of through the precinct.” She bit her lip. Edrisa started pulling out newspaper clippings and print outs from online sources from any time he was mentioned in a case. “I just thought I could show you that I understood you.” She closed her eyes. “I know, looking at all this, it makes me seem kinda like a stalker, but I swear I never followed you. I just…googled a lot and misused police resources.”

Bright looked at all of this, his eyes tracing over everything in front of him.

“You hate me, don’t you?” she said.

“I asked JT to run a background check on Eve.”

“What?”

He looked up at her, “I asked Dani too, but, out of the bunch of us, apparently she has the most sense of boundaries. The point is, I don’t have much a leg to stand on.”

“I thought you were going to be furious.”

Bright reached across the table, “I thought you weren’t going to be my friend anymore.”

She reached for his hand and stopped. For the first time ever, she asked, “Can I touch you?” He smiled softly at her and nodded. Edrisa took his hand.

“I would never stop being your friend.”

“I would never be mad at you.”

She smiled at him and he returned it, and for a moment, they sat there like that. Bright frowned, tapping the notepad. “Wait, what is this for?”

“Oh…it’s a…well.” Edrisa took a breath and sat straighter, “I’m going to write a pledge.”

“A pledge?”

“One of these days, I will find a way to stop being in love with you, and when I do, a catch like me has to get back out there. But it turns out, you, as always, were right Bright. When I find someone who loves me back, I don’t want to get lost in loving him or her or them.” She nodded. “I want to love them well, not just a lot.” She pulled the notepad closer. “So, I,” she said, writing it down as she spoke, “Edrisa Tanaka, do solemnly swear…”

“The Marauders?” he asked, smiling slightly.

“Yes,” Edrisa replied, beaming at him. “I should have known you would get my references. You always do.” She shook her head then. “Ahem. I do solemnly swear that my obsessing over potential partners is over. I swear not to use my law enforcement privileges to look into any future romantic encounters. I will only cyber stalk when supervised to make sure I don’t go too far. But let’s be real,” she said, stopping her writing for a moment, “Looking them up on social media is going to happen.” She went back to writing, “And I will not…” she glanced at the box. “Make trash they give me into mementos.” She looked at the lollipop wraper, cringing. Edrisa signed the pledge with a flourish and pushed it across the table. “To witness it.”

Bright smiled at her, signing it too and pushing it back.

“Bright,” Edrisa said. He looked up, meeting her eyes and seeing the tears in them. “I will stop loving you like this, but you will always be one of the most important people in my life. I want you to find…” she paused, her throat thick with emotion, “I want you to find the kind of love you’re looking for.” She reached over and took his hand again. “Because you deserve it. I hope one day you’ll believe that as much as I do.” Bright felt tears threatening his own eyes.

“Edrisa, the way you’ve cared about me…you have given me something. The other stuff aside, in the end, Edrisa, you believed me and believed in me and I didn’t know how much I needed that in my life into you entered it.”

“Bright, I just finished crying,” she said, crying again. “Can I hug you?”

“Yes, Edrisa. You can always hug me.” She got up and came over to him, careful to avoid his leg, and leaned down. She pulled him into a tight hug, crying into his shoulder.

“I love you. You know, obviously, I do. But I also friendship love you.”

He laughed, a quiet, teary sound that seemed to just bubble out of him. “Me too.”

Four hours later, when Gil returned to the precinct with Dani and JT, they stopped at the door of the conference room. Gil’s eyebrows hit his hairline. Bright sat where he left him, but Edrisa was with him now, and the two of them were hunched over a table full of photos of people of all genders who seemed too young for the profile Bright gave earlier.

“Are these potential suspects?”

“Not for this case,” Bright replied.

“What case are they suspects for?” Dani asked, crossing her arms.

“Suspects isn’t quite the word,” Edrisa replied, she began quickly putting the photos together in a pile. “More like…potentials.”

“Potential whats?” Gil asked.

Edrisa smiled at him, “Rebounds. Bye, detectives.” She left, skipping out of the room like this was the most normal thing anyone has ever said to their boss.

“Did she just say rebounds?” Gil repeated, turning to Bright.

“As in rebounds for Edrisa,” Dani said.

“I feel like the right thing to say here is no,” Bright said. “But, we were just taking a break and using my profiling to narrow down her tinder results.”

Dani covered her mouth, trying to stifle back a laugh.

“To be clear because Tally will make me recount every detail of this later, you were helping Edrisa choose a rebound to get over you.” Dani was leaning on the wall to keep herself upright from how hard the barely contained laughter was hitting her. Gil felt himself shaking his head, utterly dumbfounded. Finally, he just looked at Bright and asked.

“So, everything is okay there?”

The smile Bright gave him in return was something soft, gentle, and genuine. “Yeah. It is.”


End file.
